AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
