my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I need to stop coming to work sober
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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