nut hugger
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
