Non-Jews are for practice
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
