I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
We had sex on a dog bed..
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
