You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
You ate ashes out of my bong
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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