I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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