Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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