12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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