She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
