went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
is that a dick in a sweater?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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