I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
