I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Randomize
