I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Randomize
