At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
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