Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
How external is "for external use only"?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize