who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
