Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
