We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize
