Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize