Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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