dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
