I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Rumble strips road head = magical
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
