and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
