i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
