he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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