I forgot how hot balto sounded
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
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