my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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