You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
