first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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