We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Randomize
