i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
