just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
