Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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