he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
