I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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