Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
