It's Friday. Sex?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize