Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
A bitchslap is in order.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
