There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
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