Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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