one might say we're banned from that church
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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