there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
