I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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