If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Randomize