He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Randomize
