I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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