so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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