yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
