Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
